Sometimes I am so overwhelmed by the amount of love that I feel for this child that I am brought to tears. Other times, I feel like I am going to completely loose my mind.
A veces me abrumo con todo el amor que siento por esta niña que hasta me dan ganas de llorar. Y en otros momentos, siento que voy a perder la mente.
Like yesterday, when she hauled off and bitch slapped me because I wouldn't let her hold onto the Fudgesicle we were sharing. I told her no in my angry voice and spanked her a little bit. She got the point. I was feeling very parental and figured that I would not see her internal monster rear its stinkin' head again. However, low and behold, not an hour later she did it again. I sat there is disbelief, running over in my head all that I have learned about child development. I tried to decide if my punishment was age appropriate. I debated over whether my "angry voice and spanking" were the right thing to correct the rotten behavior. I don't know. I might be headed to the book store.
Como ayer, cuando se alborotó y me dio una gran cachetada porque no dejaba que ella sosteniera la paleta que estábamos compartiendo. Le dije que no en mi voz de enojada y le di en las nalgitas. Me pareció que entendió el sentimiento. Me sentí muy en control y pensé que no volviera a ver su monstruo interno. Pero, imagínense, ni una hora después me lo volvió a hacer! Me quedé sentada en incredulidad, trate de recordarme de todas las cosas que eh aprendido sobre el desarrollo de los niños. Traté de razonar si el castigo fue apropiado para su edad. Empezar a dudar si "mi voz enojada y darle una nalgada" era lo correcto para corregir su comportamiento pésimo. No se. Quizás vaya a la librería.
This is a nice mommy and daughter picture. Our bodies are so tenderly rejuvenating in harmony. There is so much love and warmth. Then later that day...she coldcocked me! Twice!
Esta es una foto bonita de las dos. Nuestros cuerpos se están rejuvenando en armonía. Hay tanto amor y cariño. Y unas horas después.... me dio una gran manada! Dos veces!
Lilly was arting today while I was reading about stages of development. "Each stage is important and only happens once." The "once" part is what got to me. I spend so much time trying to manage work, chores, errands and the multitude of obligatory events, that I am guilty of losing sight of the fact that every second of every day she is growing and learning and becoming the little person that she is going to be.
